Life in the Canadian Air Age #1 · Wednesday May 14, 2008 by colin newell
Tickets, check. Passports, check. Luggage, check. Baby…
Someone forget the baby?
A family boarded a flight on Monday in Vancouver, and forgot their child at the Vancouver airport. Oops.
The 23-month-old boy’s family had just arrived in Canada from the Philippines, but they had to re-pack their overweight bags before catching the connecting flight to Winnipeg. So they were running late.
In their Olympic sprint to the gate, the family became separated. Been there, done that.
The boy’s father Jun, thought his son was with his wife.
The boy’s grandparents, who ran ahead thought the boy was with his dad.
On the plane, the family members were seated separately and so did not immediately realize they had left the child behind. An honest mistake.
Eventually, a security guard found the boy, who speaks no English, wandering near the departure gate, and Air Canada officials tracked down his shocked parents on the flight. Thank heavens the RCMP didn’t find the kid first… Tazer-tot anyone?
Because of the boys tender age, he was not issued a boarding pass.
And would have sat on a parent’s lap during the flight…
…so airline personnel did not notice a passenger was missing.
Airport security found a Tagalog-speaking Air Canada agent who looked after the child while his father flew 2,300 kilometers (1,400 miles) back to Vancouver to pick him up. What a wonderful and full first day in Canada!
Gas Price Rant #13 F-cked at the pump in time for the long weekend · Tuesday May 13, 2008 by colin newell
The Canadian May long weekend approaches.
And we all know what that means:
- an extra day to sleep in
- a family gathering or outing
- inexplicably higher gas prices
That’s right folks – It is a Canadian tradition. As reliable as gravity and daily sunrises, the price of gas goes up and up and up and up. You would almost say that it is predictable. Of course it is not.
Yet you have to wonder – if the price of gas goes up on the weekend because of demand ostensibly signaling the beginning of summer driving season…
Why doesn’t the price of beer go up on the weekend?
Or BBQ sauces?
Or take-out Pizza?
It is all supply and demand right?
Truth is, oil price increases are the result of frantic speculation – futures.
Oil is the number one traded commodity. Picture 100% of the global production and/or extraction of oil from the ground. Ten times that… or hundred times that resource changes hands annually on the stock markets of the World.
It’s liquid gold. And like real Gold, if you had to buy solid Gold several times a week, you would be feeling the same pinch in our beloved free market society.
As for the future? Are we screwed?
Yea. Pretty much.
Have a safe Canadian May long weekend. Drive safely – if you can afford to.
Or stay home with your friends and family.
And order a pizza.
Technology madness in the modern World #1 · Monday May 12, 2008 by colin newell
If I had an extra 5 or 6 hours a day… to think… and perchance to write, I would have more strange stuff to feed you…
Perhaps more than you would like.
I mean, everything here is written and read (by you) voluntarily.
You can shut if off whenever you want. And never come back.
Which is kind of counter intuitive compared to what we have to deal with in the modern World. Having stuff pushed on us that is. Constantly.
(And)When I talk and write about cafe culture, I often remind my audience that coffee is the number two most traded commodity on the Planet… Oil being first.
But is this supposition entirely true? Are humans not the number one commodity on the Planet? Our minds are bought, sold, pitched to, filled and subjected to rendition on an almost continuous basis. And so much so that we are rarely aware that we are being manipulated?
Some examples: Facebook. Facebook is a data mine for marketers. Explain that to the average user of Facebook and you will get that classic, Dog cocking its head as its master makes a funny noise look.
Television. Everyone knows that 50% of the crap on TV is designed to sell you something, to sanitize something, to perfume something, to put you in a car and get you away from over sanitized and funky smelling stuff.
And if you are Rami Tambello of illegalsigns.ca (the Toronto area rogue spear fighting a winning battle against big visual ad agencies like Pattison Outdoor – who bend the rules for fun and profit…) you know the distance large corporations will go to get their message shoved down your visual cortex…
In Rami’s own words: “Ad agents lie for a living… trying to convince you that a pair of blue jeans will make you sexy… a fragrance will make you desirable…”
So. For liars, breaking the law on a daily basis comes naturally.
And you can almost avoid the visual assault – if you are legally blind that is.
So what’s next you ask? Apparently a technology called Hypersonic Sound (developed by the U.S. Military no less) can actually beam messages directly into your head — and there is no tin-foil hat made that will protect you.
H.S. technology uses ultrasonic beams of narrowly focused acoustic energy that can quite literally be concentrated into an area the size of a bread-box… or a nut house – which is where you will think you are when you experience it.
Which begs the question: What private space is left for we humans? Our brains were once considered the ultimate private sanctuary, a zone where other people can’t intrude without our knowledge or permission – This barrier has been eroded it seems.
Rami Tambello concludes, “There is no distance that advertisers will not go to… to deliver their message or product. There is so much money… profit at stake…breaking the laws of the community, pushing all the boundaries of what is communally acceptable – well, it is part of doing business… all in a days work.”
Yay. Thanks Rami.
In this continuing series on invasive technology in the 21st century, the CoffeeCrew blog will focus on the folly of modern technical wares and how they are not improving our lives.
This is the modern World - Panasonic microwave oven · Sunday May 4, 2008 by colin newell
We just got our first microwave oven. No really. The sales guy (aged about 60) at the Victoria Sears sales center in appliances was incredulous.
I may as well have suggested that a legion of vacuum cleaner shaped electro-beasts from the Planet Zontar were disembarking onto the parking lot…
And were they angry.
Seriously though. As shopping goes, there are few Men that shop faster than I do.
Recently I selected new frames in an optical place… within 7.2 seconds.
Which begs the question: At that speed of visual acquisition, did I really need new glasses?
Fair enough – I did some online research and determined that this particular model of Panasonic microwave (in stainless-steel, 1.2 cubic feet, 1200 Watts, etc) was the right one for us. And I was in and at the counter talking to sales-guy within a minute – and ordering one within 2 minutes.
“Would you like to order one”, he asked, somewhat skeptical of my technological lineage…
“Yes, but first I need to consult with my C.F.O on this newfangled…” now gesturing towards my Motorola RAZR, “…wireless device!”
“Oh. You have one of those… How bold! …he improvised.
Long story short – We now have a device that will help us save lots of electricity. We do almost 100% of our cooking from scratch. No pre-prepared anything – and very few tins. And being able to do tertiary stuff beside our regular electric grill will be very useful.
Oh yea – while I was at the mall for this purchase, my wife asked me to pop into Bolen Books and size up some good microwave cook books.
I might as well have been looking for a basic Pet Rock users manual or the latest step-by-step guide to Disco dancing. Microwave cook books, it seem, went out of print around the advent of MTV and are about as fashionable as polyester stretch pants.
But I found one microwave cook book, at our Chapters Book Store (your Barnes and Noble)… printed in England… about 20 years ago.
With timely recipes like; Leek terrine with deli meats, Pork Crumble, Herby Baked Tomatoes, and Austrian nut pudding…
So this is what the Brits ate during the last great war!
In addition to this cook book and appliance, I now need a historic culinary translator.
One thing at a time.
Look forward to more food oriented blogs on this website (as time permits).
In all fairness, the cookbook is titled The Microwave Kitchen Handbook by Carol Bowen first printed in 1998. Bon Apetit!
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