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Spring into weird behavior - Billy Bob Thornton on CBC Q · Wednesday April 8, 2009 by colin newell

CBC Radio host and national media treasure, Jian Ghomeshi, has a heart of gold… and a vocal delivery that sounds like a combination of crushed velvet and a tropical breeze.

And after listening to and watching the interview with B-List actor, C-List musician and certifiable dirt-bag – Billy Bob Thornton… I am pretty confident that Jian is a saint.

For me, Jian Ghomeshi is the sound of Canadian pop culture and the Canuck perspective on, well… everything. His recent interview with Gordon Lightfoot was nothing less than seminal – my point being, what other radio personality can so radically define and describe how Lightfoot is so quintessentially Canadian… that one really does not know where the fabric of Canadian culture and pop history begins and the very nature of Lightfoot’s music ends.

And so it was as Jian Ghomeshi attempted to make sense of Billy Bob’s mini-melt down and tantrum – while maintaining some semblance of continuity… meanwhile Billy Bob’s bandmates in the band the Boxmasters looked utterly wilting as their leader attempted to lead Jian down a David Lynchian avenue of nonsensical answers, suppositions and self-indulgent rhetoric.

I mean really. Who in their right mind would compare himself to Tom Petty and then when stimulated for details on his music, Thornton instead provided a Lewis Carrol on a zine he subscribed to called Famous Monsters of Film-land.

Drugs were clearly on Billy Bob.

Then again, it was 6 o clock this morning in the CBC studios in Toronto… and if you watch the video closely you can see Billy Bob combine an air of utter contempt and at the same time giving the viewers a sense of the darkest American zeitgeist available to Thornton – my wife pointing out… “That dude looks evil…”

Evil. Arrogant. Self-important. And stupid.
Wasting perfectly good airtime on CBC radio.

Anyway. Have a look at the video. You will be glad you did.
And play it safe: Do not call Billy Bob an actor!

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Spring forward into high-definition · Sunday April 5, 2009 by colin newell

HD-PVR for HD on the Sony TVWe have had a Sony Wega Trinitron 32” CRT Flat-screen TV for almost 5 years… it was one of the 1st HD-Ready TV’s – It has an HDMI input on it and 2 separate component video input sets.

Our cable provider, Shaw, had a promotion on – a special on HD terminals and HD-PVR boxes. Well, we thought… I guess it is time to jump on board prior to our TV being completely obsolete.

So we sign up. And I opt for self installation being a telecom professional and all.

Right.

Home I go, with box in hand – and I install it.
Follow the instructions. Hook it up and call Shaw.
Have a human on the line within 4 minutes.
They enable it over the network.
Hmmm. I get audio but no video.
The helpful dude on the other end of the line suggests their help line – there is a very small wait queue at the time. I am connected to the help line within one minute.

The resolution: I had one of the component video cables crossed – and they are clearly color coded… and this is the kind of stuff I work with all day.

Major point being: You really do not want to be a passenger on my commuter jet when I am in the cockpit. I make little mistakes from time to time. Which I guess everyone does. As a technical professional, I tend to do one too many highly technically demanding things too often in the course of one day. Thankfully, no one dies.

Anyhow – enjoying NHL Hockey in 1080i… and the Discovery Channel spiders in 1080i… looking forward to time shifting my favorite show into my reality.


Colin Newell is a Victoria resident, electronics technologist and media engineer – and a food writer for EAT Magazine. And if the number of typos in this article are any indication – we are doomed!

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Spring into nasty grand parenting · Friday April 3, 2009 by colin newell

This grandpa was a nasty piece of workI do not have any kids. I Never had a real urge to make a contribution to the gene pool.

And for the most part I am glad that there are some folks out there doing it on my behalf…
to a point that is…

My wife and I were in McDonald’s at lunch for our one guilty pleasure; I enjoy an Angus Burger, a side of fries and some iced tea. We eat healthy all week long – so from time to time… we need to re-balance if you know what I mean. Too much of a good thing and all…

Anyway – sitting upstairs at the normally quiet Cedar Hill and Shelbourne location at noon today… something caught my attention.
It was the expression of my wife tuning into a conversation between grandpa and his seemingly well behaved grand-son… that caught my eye – And I tuned into it a millisecond later.

Grandpa was saying… and I quote: “If you do not stop your messing around, I am going to kick your ass!”

Apparently the small boy, according to what we could see, was being overly jovial and chatty being near the excitement of the kiddie playground on the main floor…

The 4 year old responded, “That is not a very nice thing to say Grandpa…”

Grandpa responded, “And it isn’t going to be a very nice thing to happen to you if you don’t smarten up!”
A Great-Granny was sitting with them and she kind of looked on, oblivious to the conversation between the grand-thug and the young boy…

This is 2009 – and I was astounded that I was hearing this violent exchange directed at a small child. And I was baffled as to how to respond…
saying to my wife… “Shall I go over there and KICK his ass?”

No. Probably not a good idea.

I was (we were) in fact, witnessing an event of child abuse unfolding and I was at a complete loss as to what to do about it. The conversation ended with the above exchange between the 2. The kid settled down a bit and the grand-thug settled into reading his paper.

But what of after… the later on for that 4 year old?

Sometimes violence is subtle – and one needs to be diligent to protect our young. In this particular case… well, I just don’t know.

Maybe the parents of this child will read this. Now that would be ironic.
One other thing: Moms and Dads… when you are out with your small children… Watch them! When we were coming into the McDonalds today, a young Mom and her Son and Daughter were with her. The boy was dawlding, kicking imaginary stones and counting the cracks in the sidewalk. He fell back about 20 feet as she went into the food outlet ahead of him and did not turn around until the door closed behind her.

He could have been grabbed in a heart beat by a clone of grand-thug above.
Anyway. Just a suggestion.

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Spring forward - out of my face Chapter one · Tuesday March 31, 2009 by colin newell

Google Street View - get the fuck out of my faceI think it is pretty safe to say that if you poll your friends (about the Google Street View concept) they will be split 50-50.

Go ahead try.

Many people are in the “So what, who cares, it is kind of cool” camp. Like, I will be the first to admit that the application has some uses.
Quite a few folks are adverse to having their privacy invaded.
Some folks will say… “If you have nothing to hide then you won’t mind if we take a quick peek up your kilt…”
Which is essentially what Google Street View is working on – as they prepare to deploy on the streets of Canada.

Google street view should know one thing – Canadians are not Americans… and they are not Brits.

Brits are so accustomed to being preyed upon by a impertinent and overly prying government that they ignore that they are observed, on average… 64 times a day.

Not so much in Canada.

Personally, I like the feeling of walking alone – or with my wife… on the streets of Victoria – sometimes on a Friday… or on a day off – and the feeling of being somewhat on the lam. Even if it is my own personal illusion.

And I like to be able to maintain my personal freedom from observance – especially when I am such a well behaved citizen.

So a message to Google Street view… no, a promise:
If I see a Google Street view camera cross my path… and there is a rock or a stick within my reach… I promise you that I am going to aim it squarely at the Google Street view vehicle…
with a curt “Get out of my face Google street view”
Get out. Of my face. Or else.

That’s my opinion. What’s yours?


Colin Newell is a Victoria resident and a writer of words – normally friendly when watered and well fed, the Newell can lash out when it encounters foolishness or bad behavior

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